Is this substantial enough for an adult audience: It was a whimper , and Liam stopped dead in his unfurling path , honing in on the sound. "Ryan , do you hear that ?" . As Liam approached the ransacked dumpster, he dropped on his hands and knees , peering under the crack. Something moist grazed the side of his eyebrow , then proceeded to strike him in the eye . Then he felt the warm breath on his face , and a yelp rang through his eardrums . "What the hell-" Stumbling back on his knees he watched, stunned as mass a of sable fur launched itself at his lap , and began licking his collarbone with exuberance. "Hey , calm down buddy..." Liam ruffled the dog's head, disarmed by the assualt. "Ryan I'm being attacked by a girl, she -Oh God Ry' -" Liam's echoes of laughter rang through Ryan's core as he caught up to the pair. "Another admirer huh?" . He knelt beside the over zealous German shepherd pup, rapping his knuckle playfully over its back, and its attention was stolen by Ryan's amused grin. "Hey , look at her ribcage though-" Ryan lamented as she twisted around to dampen his palm with her roaming tongue . "Poor thing's malnourished, and been out here too long I bet." Liam reached out to stroke her fur , observing the dryness of her nose. "She's got a lot of energy though , and she pounced on me, no fear. You think a dog this trusting wouldn't have been abused..." Ryan , suddenly running his hand absentmindedly through his own hair , exhaled with a heavy gleam in his eye. " yeah maybe she hasn't eaten too well , but I'm thinking she belonged to someone , and that someone..." Liam dragged his voice into an audible range his eyes devoid of light "yeah , well look at us. Our own dogs don't know what the hell happened to us. One thing I do know ; we have to watch out for her now. Ryan simply ran his hand over the bridge of her nose as she swiped her tongue along his fingers. "Yeah. Wonder what her name is. No collar and all..." Liam , smirking as he took up a fistful of her fur as she writhed in his lap reached down to run a finger across her stomach. "Well, she'll just have live with me calling her "Harley" now . As Ryan's fingers tousled her hair and she nudged him with her left ear as she rolled around in Liam's lap he sighed "You're gonna be safe with us. I might have some leftover jerky actually-" Ryan rummaged through his pockets, locating the stub of jerky and offering it to the newly dubbed Harley with a soft tone. "Here girl, get this into you". At first she was hesitant , sniffing the stale aroma of Ryan's jeans infused into the snack, before wolfing it down, almost claiming a finger. "Hey , who's hungry , huh? " he smiled as he recoiled his fingers and wiped off his hands. "Well Liam , there's gonna be three of us for a while at least ...", his mind seemed to linger on the thought as his eyes rose to the concrete footing ahead, and the dumpsters isolated existence. "You do realise , we have to -" Liam , still sitting with Harley sprawled across his thighs , trailed his eyes to the broken down building beyond. "Oh yeah, we have to search that place, because there might be traces of something -I mean , there won't be a body or surely this girl here would be stayin' by their side. But the way these bastards just bind and capture , there's gotta be some sick remnants strewn in broad daylight ..." With a heavy sigh, Ryan clamoured to his feet , with Harley wandering behind him ."c'mon Harley girl, let's find out how you got here. " ... Ryan rummaged through his pockets, locating the stub of jerky and offering to the newly dubbed Harley with a soft tone. "Here girl, get this into you". At first she was hesitant , sniffing the stale aroma of Ryan's jeans infused into the snack, before wolfing it down, almost claiming a finger. "Hey , who's hungry , huh? " he smiled as he recoiled his fingers and wiped off his hands. "Well Liam , there's gonna be three of us for a while at least ." His mind seemed to linger on the thought as his eyes rose to the concrete footing ahead, and the dumpsters isolated existence. "You do realise , we have to -" Liam , still sitting with Harley sprawled across his thighs , trailed his eyes to the broken down building beyond. "Oh yeah, we have to search that place, because there might be traces of something -I mean , there won't be a body or surely this girl here would be stayin' by their side. But the way this bastards just bind and capture , there's gotta be some sick remnants-" With a heavy sigh, Ryan clamoured to his feet , with Harley wandering behind him ."c'mon Harley girl, let's find out how you got here". "Damnit" Ryan's groan shattered the silence as he unearthed a cracked leather wallet, and flipped through the headshots. A pair of bright green eyes and a plastered smile gleamed eerily back through the plastic sleeves . "Logan Gray, 28, Male ." As Harley sat by his boot, tugging on his lace, absorbed with the activity , he glanced down in hesitation. As he hovered the wallet above her head, she cocked as ear in sudden interest. Then his stomach flipped as she let out a distressed whine, and urinated by his feet. "It's ok Harley" Ryan stroked the dog's back in shock , sliding down at her side . "Liam-I think we've found Harley's owner. Well , what's left of him-" Liam appeared at Ryan's shoulder , a grim expression passing across his features . He paused , scratching Harley's ears as she recoiled from the pool of urine , her whimpers lining the atmosphere with dread. "I know, but we're gonna find him, girl. " Harley , seeming to sense the loss , dropped onto her stomach as buried her head between her paws. "She's just a pup but, damn I know the feeling" Ryan said in a hushed tone. "I don't know where the hell he is but most likely he's alive and suffering plenty." Liam sank down beside the shaking dog and stroked her fur, his eyes glazing over. "Yeah. But we'll find him, or die trying."

So it's. it substantial enough

But just as a standalone piece , is it aimed more at children, teens or adults

What makes it appear aimed at adults

Is the writing itself juvenile or more complex

What are some simple sentences and how can I make them more complex : It was a whimper , and Liam stopped dead in his unfurling path , honing in on the sound. "Ryan , do you hear that ?" . As Liam approached the ransacked dumpster, he dropped on his hands and knees , peering under the crack. Something moist grazed the side of his eyebrow , then proceeded to strike him in the eye . Then he felt the warm breath on his face , and a yelp rang through his eardrums . "What the hell-" Stumbling back on his knees he watched, stunned as mass a of sable fur launched itself at his lap , and began licking his collarbone with exuberance. "Hey , calm down buddy..." Liam ruffled the dog's head, disarmed by the assualt. "Ryan I'm being attacked by a girl, she -Oh God Ry' -" Liam's echoes of laughter rang through Ryan's core as he caught up to the pair. "Another admirer huh?" . He knelt beside the over zealous German shepherd pup, rapping his knuckle playfully over its back, and its attention was stolen by Ryan's amused grin. "Hey , look at her ribcage though-" Ryan lamented as she twisted around to dampen his palm with her roaming tongue . "Poor thing's malnourished, and been out here too long I bet." Liam reached out to stroke her fur , observing the dryness of her nose. "She's got a lot of energy though , and she pounced on me, no fear. You think a dog this trusting wouldn't have been abused..." Ryan , suddenly running his hand absentmindedly through his own hair , exhaled with a heavy gleam in his eye. " yeah maybe she hasn't eaten too well , but I'm thinking she belonged to someone , and that someone..." Liam dragged his voice into an audible range his eyes devoid of light "yeah , well look at us. Our own dogs don't know what the hell happened to us. One thing I do know ; we have to watch out for her now. Ryan simply ran his hand over the bridge of her nose as she swiped her tongue along his fingers. "Yeah. Wonder what her name is. No collar and all..." Liam , smirking as he took up a fistful of her fur as she writhed in his lap reached down to run a finger across her stomach. "Well, she'll just have live with me calling her "Harley" now . As Ryan's fingers tousled her hair and she nudged him with her left ear as she rolled around in Liam's lap he sighed "You're gonna be safe with us. I might have some leftover jerky actually-" Ryan rummaged through his pockets, locating the stub of jerky and offering it to the newly dubbed Harley with a soft tone. "Here girl, get this into you". At first she was hesitant , sniffing the stale aroma of Ryan's jeans infused into the snack, before wolfing it down, almost claiming a finger. "Hey , who's hungry , huh? " he smiled as he recoiled his fingers and wiped off his hands. "Well Liam , there's gonna be three of us for a while at least ...", his mind seemed to linger on the thought as his eyes rose to the concrete footing ahead, and the dumpsters isolated existence. "You do realise , we have to -" Liam , still sitting with Harley sprawled across his thighs , trailed his eyes to the broken down building beyond. "Oh yeah, we have to search that place, because there might be traces of something -I mean , there won't be a body or surely this girl here would be stayin' by their side. But the way these bastards just bind and capture , there's gotta be some sick remnants strewn in broad daylight ..." With a heavy sigh, Ryan clamoured to his feet , with Harley wandering behind him ."c'mon Harley girl, let's find out how you got here. "

So all my sentences are too simple

Is this more complex nuanced narrative? Don't revise it : It only amounted to one, and it would always be one and never two --and through his jaundice-soaked corneas, all he could see was nausea. Suddenly, he was overcome by a violent heave, a primal urge rising in his liver. Bile stained his teeth, and the following retches were acidic, lashing the roof of his mouth with fury. It could never stop: his body rejected the substance over and over; he was hanging by a thread of sanity. "Not again. Please no-" Liam clenched his teeth, the crucial moment upon him; he had to keep the substance down, or the consequences would be dire. His eyes scanned the horizon with desperation before his lids slid closed, and he was wracked with shivers of resistance. Then, as the urge to be sick overcame him, a voice pierced through his fog of despair, a lifeline amidst his struggle. "Can you hear me?" the rough, concerned tone asked as Liam writhed against the concrete, groaning in agony. "Don't try to answer that, just blink twice. Take it slow." As he fought to drag his eyelids upward, the pain, like a coiling wire, constricted his blood flow in brutal retaliation. "Make it stop-No I-" he choked out , his voice puncturing the air. If he expelled the violating drug from his intestines, his efforts would to amount to zero. Square one. The next moment , the substance began its rise, emanating a negative battery melting into a metal cylinder as his throat tightened. He was at the end of a long night,his vision raw from never resting his eyes, the blood vessels all but ruptured and torn. The ingested substance had been a sinister mistake , and if he threw up twice, the contraband would be purged from his system; he battled to hold it inside. All he had could never be enough, he countered, what ever could? Even his attempts to obey the voice , coming from somewhere above him, seemed in vain. As Liam writhed in the dying sunlight, his skin erupted in feverish bumps, a crawling sensation exploring the surface of his skin. A sensation of violation jolted down his spine as he screamed through his clenched teeth in helplessness . The nausea rose again, claiming his entire being, his heart continuing to pulse, counting away the seconds till he submitted. "Help me--No. No," he pled through his locking jaw as he fought another potent wave. The instinctive reaction of his body gripped every fiber as he felt his fight ending. He sank his teeth into his gag, screaming against the material bound across his tongue, taunting his strength and resilience. Then, in one dreaded motion, the inevitable rise built within him, futile to resistance. His pupils dilated with horror as his gag soon became saturated with the vile substance, leaving a bitter sting as he struggled against it; the retches that followed heaving through his chest. Liam collapsed into the unforgiving embrace of the concrete, his ravaged body welcoming the end with resignation. "Shit," he lamented in terror, the heat in his own voice spreading across his flesh like untamed fire . "Twice... now it's too late." As he twisted his gaze away from the glistening pool of spilt contraband , he diverted the evident failure. And in a mixture of pure shock and trauma, his eyelids slid closed with exhaustion, his body embracing closure of his fight. After his ongoing efforts and endless torment, he failed to hold down the implanted substance, and it was over. But the voice persisted, causing Liam to force his eyes open, gritting his teeth in determination. "No, I'm still here Liam; I'm getting the binds off--hang tight," the voice reassured. Liam shook his head in disbelief, protesting, the fear tugging at his psyche like a fishing line as he cursed in his mouth. "No, you can't help--" As Liam fought to refocus his gaze, a pair of deep hazel eyes locked onto his own with concern. "Hey, breathe. I've got you. It's me, Ry'. Hold on while I get rid of this--" Liam flinched as his gag was torn from his mouth, and he gasped for fresh air, the stifling atmosphere saturating him with perspiration. "Oh, God, I threw up the contraband--those bastards will kill me like a dog. Or worse-" Liam's eyes enlarged with realization as he spoke, running a hand through his disheveled hair. . "I'll be, well you saw right? ..." Liam's voice was filled with sickened resignation, his resolve seeping from his pores and evaporating into the arid atmosphere. Ryan rested his hand on Liam's kneecap , his grasp firm and anchoring as Liam averted his gaze. "I saw everything they did to you, yeah. And I'm still here alright?. Not about to abandon you now..."

Ok how about this passage : Liam, reaching up and gripping Ryan's arm firmly, smiled against the warm twilight rays of daylight that clung to his flesh. "Hell of a thing to endure, seeing all that... Damn lucky we're both still breathing. " Liam , pulling on Ryan's arm , found the strength to prop himself into a seated position "Shit. get over here, Ry". With a rough jerk, Liam hauled Ryan into a haphazard hug, slamming an open palm over his back as he pulled their shoulders together. Smiling in pain Ryan let their shoulders connect with a crash of solidarity, as he replied "Yeah, yeah . Calm down", returning a supportive thump over Liam's arm. "So you're outta your binds and you untied mine, stripped my gag -and-" Liam's head fell to his hand , cradling his temple and gritting his teeth. "I don't remember what happened- how many times did they-" Ryan responded with a gun-metal hollowness, his words smoked out by his steady exhale. "Several times at least . Enough times enough for anyone, let's say that." Liam wrapped his arm around Ryan's shoulder, hoisting himself from the ground into a slouch, bracing his other arm behind himself, and finally standing upright "Well , it feels like they've killed me already.. the hell I've been through." Ryan only whispered in reply, his voice thick with acknowledgment. "Yeah." The drugs in his vision burned with a harsh sting, and Liam shook his head to regain some clarity. "I don't remember how I got here. No damn clue." Ryan outstretched his lean, muscular arm and hauled Liam to his feet with an exhaustive grunt, wrapping an arm around his chest in support of his weight. "I can explain to you exactly how, but later, one thing at a time. Just try to walk with me; we can get out of here." However, as they made their first attempt to leave, Liam's attention was abruptly hijacked by the sight of his own ruined clothing, and his jaw clenched. The shock sent a wave of tension through him, rooting him to the spot; his body rebelling his next step. In a voice laced with dread he whispered "Please help me-" His eye remained fixated on his jeans, stained with fingerprints, lying crumpled on the side of the path. Noticing his distress , Ryan assisted him back into them, his attention careful as Liam flinched with every movement. The denim, rough against his bare skin, left his bite crooked with agony . "Gimme a minute," he said, his bloodshot eyes holding a glimmer of resistance as he forced his ankle through the second hem and buttoned the waist. "They don't care what they leave behind," he muttered, his eyes catching on an emptied bottle of lubricant and the confronting plastic surface of a turned-in glove not far from his dehumanizing undergarments.

But are the sentences too simple for adult literature

What about this : Ryan, supporting Liam's weight, uttered mere fragments of speech, his heart seized momentarily by the display that had all but paralysed Liam. "Sadistic, perverted bastards," he almost spat , his voice rising above a whisper as his eyes darkened. "Try to focus on the here and now, yeah?" he muttered , guiding Liam away from the indignity that lay strewn before them, remnants of the twisted inhumanity they'd suffered. Liam's grinding teeth betrayed his disgust and utter defamation as he nodded, shielded only by Ryan's insistent survival instinct and camaraderie, as he managed a sullen "Yeah." They walked in shared disorientation, with Liam reduced to muteness , trauma still assaulting his perception with a harrowing grip , gnawing at the edges of his decaying composure. Finally, as their footsteps struggled to fall in sync , Liam forced the gravelled words through his teeth. "Ry' I don't know what's real, and what the contraband made me believe" . his voice, echoing desperation as he countered "I only said yes because I thought-" Ryan pulled Liam in with a rough jerk. "Doesn't matter. We never had a choice . But you put yourself in my place . And they never broke your damn spirit . And I can tell you right now, this is real." Liam , looking away with a nod , tightened his grip on Ryan's shoulder and dragged his legs into coercion. As they struggled along, footsteps not falling in sync, Liam fought to hold himself together as a flashback scorned him . "How long has it been since I was thrown down here from a helicopter? How did you get here, the same way? Please tell me you know something about this concrete hell?" Liam almost demanded answers from the barren atmosphere in an attempt to anchor himself. Ryan maintained a detached gaze as he stared beyond Liam's eyes, resting a hand on his shoulder. "I was thrown down here after you. And I was held at gunpoint, but my mistake was to resist the contraband; I suppose yours was to accept being a plant for them." Liam, gripping Ryan's forearm for leverage, lowered his gaze to avert the glare. "How was it a mistake to refuse...this? I'm so dehydrated I'm not sure I can keep going, Ry'. I need to find water, and shade. And soon." Just as a quiet settled over them, Liam whispered "I haven't forgotten what you did , Ry'. It's not your fault and don't you go thinkin'" Liam trailed off , the sheer energy of his words depleting his efforts. In a gesture of respect and understanding, Ryan nodded at the ground as he shifted his weight to maintain his upright posture . As Ryan recalled exactly what he had done to bring them to that moment , his grip on Liam remained steady, a slideshow reeling behind his eyelids . It had been just two days earlier, and he kept dragging his limbs as the flashback intruded on his thoughts.

How about this : thoughts. -------------//Two days Earlier//------// Listening as terror flooded the membranes behind his closed lids, their voices echoed in the tepid night . "If he vomits it up... we'll just have to get Valen to deal with it", a voice loomed in the distance. Clinging to every word , albeit with slipping clarity, his pulse raged through his chest as the voice skirted the edge of his mind , filling him with dread. "He won't be able to keep it down though. You know he's a useless vessel...Threw it up once already . And he can't even purge it in one go... takes him two rounds. He'll dehydrate before he's any real use." Ryan inhaled the innocuous yet insidious air, the weight of eyes boring into his haze of darkness , the blindfold that barred his vision offering a faint sliver of vision as it faltered with the jolt of his head. With terror scathing his helpless position, he fought to hear. "Next, we implant him. His refusal , his stupidity in thinking we offer options ." The unfamiliar voice threatened from above , a splatter of saliva moistened his cheek as it landed against his glistening flesh. He's the new vessel when this piece of scum finishes throwing up " A chill masticated his nerve endings as thud of s boot making rough contact with Liam's ribcage and eliciting a wrought groan, sent horror to the pits of Ryan's stomach as his glass -cage eyes watched helplessly. Ah, you fuckers" Liam's voice grunted , "I'd take you all sideways , but you'd enjoy it too much " . Shaking his pounding temples at the audacity ,his lips curved into a smirk despite the unsettling discourse of watching Liam suffer in his place from just inches away. The shadows of their boots dissipating with heavy thuds , he threw forward a few strained, dry words. "Liam I'm sorry, if I'd know how they I intended to-" Unfazed, Liam only grinned in the closeness , his nonchalance offering a certain comfort to Ryan's disarrayed nerves , "Ryan, buddy, it's simple , I said yes, and now here we are . But I have an idea, and you'll owe me later. I notice your blindfold is a little outta place...only cause I'm down here and I can see your pores ...but yeah. You know what will happen and when it does , just have a medical emergency yeah? I'm talking the whole enchilada, spasming, coughing up your own blood-" His eyebrows raising above the rim of his constricting blindfold , Ryan felt the flames of desperation chase his wit , as the heat encroached on the edges of psyche. Think about this Liam, your dehydrated, and when you puke your guts, in binds , and a gag, I could t buy you enough time. But I could ingest it when you lose it , try and hold it down , that could prevent them implanting either one of us , I'll make this work . If I can save it , and swallow it , retain it , after you fail yet again , they might just leave you alone . And if I can hold it down , they might not have to resort to-" His voice stopped in his throat as an involuntary shiver coursed down his spine. Biting out the words the panic held in chains as he pressed on , the room closing in."And at this stage I don't really care how disgusting your insides will taste . I doubt the effects will be half as bad as-" Liam's laughter rang out through his gritted teeth, "Ry, I like how you think ...I can appreciate a man with a sick mind . But this is a choice I made, and I'm not sure I feel so sound with you doin' that...for me" With a glean of hopelessness slithering across his retinas and submerging into his visual field, the tone died in Ryan's tone . "What choice do we have, Liam . This bullshit is inhumane. Don't thank me later, no need ." It was an unshakable expression etched in Liam's face , his sinking realisation of what transgression truly meant . His voice was hoarse as he whispered "Theyll only use you next , but , God I -" . "I said don't thank me Liam. I'm doing this. " He insisted, a gun metal tone perforating his voice , and hovering close in the air. All Liam managed was a hoarse "Thanks., as he collapsed face down , his smile intercepted with a grave smirk. Soon enough he succumbed to the acrid, unforgiving raze of the heat, as time became immeasurable to his convergent stream of consciousness. Only holding fragments of the plan in his drained conscious, as Liam's memory seemed to disperse into a tangled web of loose wires that disconnected and short circuited, his senses danced with trepidation. "Liam, stop thrashing . Just let it happen-" His pleas fell into the rancid , stale air between them, as Liam convulsed , screaming "No-please... I can't do this anymore-please-." His voice , hoarse from the overuse , weaved through the night with a repetition, haunting Ryan as his brain rejected the beckoning lure of sleep. "Just vomit so I can do this thing" he said roughly, his eyes sliding closed behind the blindfold in remittance. Unable to withstand another of Liam's pained movements, his outline traced by cool , eerie moonlight, its soft caress filled with disconcerting illumination. Liam's perspiration soaked flesh radiated heat, the silvery , contrasting glow that hugged Liam's burning skin, twisted nausea into the depths of Ryan's gut. Desperately trying to recall anything , he repeated the only name that found its way to his tongue ."Valen". And nothing. "Cmon Ryan, you know this..." His reactive groan struck the air , as his confusion cascaded over him. "Ah shit... we know this...we've been lying here with nothing else to do but remember which bastard is which." His mind lapsed in a tight circle of frustration as he spat at the ground. "Ah , what good is this , it's not like we can carry out the plan if he doesn't vomit at the right time. ... I got a bad feeling Liam" he mumbled . The lingering echo of his musings settled in the veneer of cold sweat that occupied the physical inches separating them . Then, in a moment both sickening and sudden, it happened."

Is the plot still clear and coherent however

Just asses the