USER: holly speaking to her therapist in silent hill. "as for our next session... we might tackle the middle point of your life... high school and the like we haven't looked into it much" "if you want someone to get a taste of hell send them to high school" holly muttered which actually got a chuckle out of the doctor "agreed, though besides that maybe well finally get to what it is your hiding from me holly" "excuse me" the doctors voice actually raised slightly not a shout but a lot more stern "please, that i don't know what you are talking about crap isn't going to cut it with me, the childhood trauma can certainly explain a lot about you like the way you present yourself the superficial things like the tattoo's and hair... but that can be said about near any girl with dyed hair walks through the doors" having placed the file back the doctor looked holly up and down for a moment he slowly walked over towards her and narrowed his eyes "sooner or later you'll open up about what's got you here... holly stop looking at the wall look at me" his voice had calmed, before it started to pick up again. "You feel guilty about something, something you feel is your fault, When we all lived in huts and wore furs, we worried over the simple things: food, water, whether animals would come and attack us in the night or in your. case...a coward of a man that preyed on a naive and innocent child. Now we have supermarkets, bottled water and .38 caliber home security, some of us having spent enough ...

USER: discard

USER: holly speaking to her therapist in silent hill. "as for our next session... we might tackle the middle point of your life... high school and the like we haven't looked into it much" "if you want someone to get a taste of hell send them to high school" holly muttered which actually got a chuckle out of the doctor "agreed, though besides that maybe well finally get to what it is your hiding from me holly" "excuse me" the doctors voice actually raised slightly not a shout but a lot more stern "please, that i don't know what you are talking about crap isn't going to cut it with me, the childhood trauma can certainly explain a lot about you like the way you present yourself the superficial things like the tattoo's and hair... but that can be said about near any girl with dyed hair walks through the doors" having placed the file back the doctor looked holly up and down for a moment he slowly walked over towards her and narrowed his eyes "sooner or later you'll open up about what's got you here... holly stop looking at the wall look at me" his voice had calmed, before it started to pick up again. "You feel guilty about something, something you feel is your fault, When we all lived in huts and wore furs, we worried over the simple things: food, water, whether animals would come and attack us in the night or in your. case...a coward of a man that preyed on a naive and innocent child. Now we have supermarkets, bottled water and .38 caliber home security, some of us having spent enough time a the range to be a decent shot holly..... So what keeps us awake at night? More often than not, guilt. If only I had acted differently... If only I hadn't said THAT... If only I had said SOMETHING... You beat yourself up with your past. Don't blame yourself, blame the WORLD. Blame GOD. Blame ME." the girl felt shaken to her core her heart racing a thousand images flooding her mind she felt like she was going to start hyperventilating perhaps that was the point, when she felt a hand on her shoulder it stopped (edited) [23:48] "i'll see you next week holly" 18 May 2023 Iked87 -- 18/05/2023 00:13 Holly had taken a moment to turn towards the door before she took her first step. The fuck was that? She continued out the door, not even looking in the direction of the secretary who was currently missing from behind her desk. Outside the building she was completely oblivious to the rather dense fog bank that had rolled in, her mind overwhelmed still by what she could be blaming herself about. Even after climbing into her car and sitting behind the wheel but not driving anywhere she struggled to really come to terms with what she was blaming herself for. "My life is so fucked." Holly muttered to herself as she leaned back in her seat. Finally starting up her car she began to back out of the parking space and head back down the small driveway of the office and to the main road which would take her to silent hill and then finally the highway to head home. spider-gwen -- 18/05/2023 00:20 as she drove she was going through the usual motions of, fuck that doctor he has no idea what he is talking about, quickly followed by the realisation that she was wrong and the sessions were in her best interest although this time she'd really be left with something to think about and she couldn't help but notice the doctors duality with his words, he'd told her to effectively admit her guilt while telling her she'd done nothing wrong and that it was the world at fault. "If only i had any fucking idea as to what im supposed to have done" letting out a grunt as she reached her exit for the road away from silent hill holly punched her steering wheel and instead took the fork in the road that would lead into town. "I need a fucking drink..." she was already committed to the fact that she'd end up over the limit and have to find a motel to spend the night. Iked87 -- 18/05/2023 00:26 Holly was watching the road ahead of her, the shifting emotions still running through her as she caught sight of a mailbox ahead alongside the road and off through the fog a small home. "Fog's so fucking thick no one is even on the road." She grunted as she realized she hadn't passed by a single vehicle on her way into town and no one was on the sidewalk. Pulling up her phone Holly was glancing between it and the road as she was checking her GPS for a nearby bar. It wasn't hard to find one and after a few turns she ended up outside of the old brick building, the neon sign in the window cutting through the fog. Pulling into a parking space along the side of the road just behind a white van she wasted no time in practically slamming her door shut and heading into the bar. A soft thrum of music could be heard until she opened the door and was blasted with it, a few patrons were already inside at their usual spots as Holly made her way towards the bar where a guy was working the counter. spider-gwen -- 18/05/2023 00:30 the bar seemed to be nearly as old as the part of town she was in, the place reeked of booze and cigarettes not her ideal place but right now it was exactly what she needed. heading up to the bar the man standing behind it looked up "what can i get you?" "beer" holly replied flatly, the bartender not even bothering to ID her, she was plenty old enough to drink, but no one ever bothered asking due to the tattoo's. holly soon found herself siting alone in a booth in the back of the bar with no plans on leaving any time soon, she just wanted to drink and stew in her thoughts. Iked87 -- 18/05/2023 00:35 Holly was going through a lot of the baggage she had back from high school, the thoughts still in her head of what her therapist had said. Aside from lashing out a hell of a lot at her teachers and other students, there wasn't much to really be guilty about. Drug use wasn't something she'd gotten into, her vice ended up being body mods and sex which as far as she could tell from her shrinks notes seemed to be a decent thing. Maybe he meant Janet... She just up and vanished before i could start getting my shit together and not be such a massive cunt. Lifting her bottle of beer Holly took a rather large swig before placing it back down. 4 July 2023 Iked87 -- Today at 20:17 Losing track of time Holly had gone through three beers before she glanced at the clock. Fuck four hours pissed away, and my ass can't drive home for a bit now. Setting the bottle down on the counter she reached for her pocket, pulling out a folded wad of cash before thumbing through it and pulling out what she owed and placing it on the counter before heading towards the door. She couldn't drive home, but the small motel just down the street would be a place she could crash on the cheap for the evening. A small crack and piece of broken off concrete from the sidewalk caused her to stumble for a moment before she caught herself on a parking meter. Groaning she pulled her hand away, a coating of some sticky slime on her palm. "Ugh.... The fuck is this?" She wiped her hand on the actual post to the parking meter, cleaning off most of the slime with a second swipe cleaned it the rest of the way. She didn't bother sticking around to try and see what the fluid was, instead opting to continue along the sidewalk until she could see the beginning of the motel through the darkening fog, the sun setting behind the mountains. "Hello? Anyone here?" She'd rung the bell three or four times now, the sign on the door said open, and it was unlocked. But she still hadn't received any indication someone was actually here in the main offices. She hadn't realized it yet, but she hasn't seen anyone since she left the bar. spider-gwen -- Today at 20:29 not really taking in her surrounds carefully enough holly let out a groan of annoyance "fuck it if i leave the cash i can help myself to a key i really doubt anyone will care" she'd figure the owner had left to grab a bite or speak to someone and wouldn't be that long she could explain the situation once they were back. just a few moments later and Holly was standing in 113 the room over looking the small parking lot below which was pretty much completely enveloped in fog by this point. "jesus christ it's worse than i knew it would be" the room was small didn't smell particularly pleasant and filled holly with the desire to shower not that she'd dare to in a place like this. the carpet was covered in stains the TV was ancient and it looked the curtains were the same ones that were put up when this place was first built. "i hate to think of how many drug deals have gone down in this place not to mention all the hookers being used.....or worse" She felt a shiver run down her spine as she moved towards the bed and sat down at which point she started to kick her sneakers off the weight of her past and her therapists words weighing on her suddenly. She couldn't help but wonder if there was something more to her past, something that she had repressed or blocked out. The thought made her stomach churn with anxiety. moments later Holly found herself putting her shoes back on at which point she pretty much threw herself onto the railing outside the room over looking the parking lot trying to light a cigarette the world closing in on her like the oppressive fog enveloping the town, she'd began having a panic attack Iked87 -- Today at 20:39 Staring at the fog covered parking lot she took in a deep breath, the smoke from her cigarette filling her lungs and giving her a calming dose of nicotine and half a dozen other chemicals and compounds to help calm herself down. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest, the rapid thrumming slowing with each passing minute until the cigarette was burned to the filter and she was forced to light another. Half way through the second cigarette she could feel her heart was mostly back to normal though she didn't dare stop smoking for fear of the panic attack returning. The fuck is wrong with me? Its like this shit has gotten worse since my therapist started pushing me about repressed memories and problems. A glimpse of movement in the fog got holly's attention, whatever it was, was headed into the managers office. Thank fuck they are back. Finish this cigarette up and then i'll go down and explain whats going on. spider-gwen -- Today at 20:50 just a moment later and with a heavy sigh she started climbing down the steps and headed for the managers office the air having grown seemingly much colder in short amount of time shorts and a tshirt... gunna have to grab something out of the car, this place isn't what i had in mind when i was told it was a resort town In her head she'd painted a picture of bars and restaurants, quirky stores that sold cool trinks, high end fashion stores and of course kids getting up to no good like partying camping out and partying in the woods or skinny dipping in the towns lake. what she had be met with however was dower little town that seemed to have it's best days behind it, sure there was the amusement park that probably saw a decent amount of traffic but holly couldn't imagine there was much else here to bring people in. having reached the owners office she noticed the door was ajar and rather than poking her inside she called out. "hey.... can i speak to some one..." there was no response but what she could hear from inside the office was a tv or radio with a real bad signal she could hear someone talking sounded like a game show or talk some but the bursts of static were real loud. for fuck shake cant here me with a grunt she started to push the door open not really sure what to expect NEW Iked87 -- Today at 20:58 Staring at her was what looked like a mosnter the growths over her eyes and covering it's mouth were terrifying "T-the fuck?" Holly stumbled backwards falling onto her rear as the woman took a staggered step towards her. This was a moment of fight flight or freeze for holly, and unfortunately her body chose freeze. Something about the macabre nature of the sickly grey skin, dark veins, and pulsating masses on her face had caused her to be unable to do anything than sit there on her rear even as the mangled being took yet another step towards her. Holly had remained still for way longer than she realised the creature was pretty much right on top of her before her instinct to save her self kicked in. she quickly scrambled back on her hands and and feet managing to cut the back of her thigh on the divider that ran along the bottom of the door in the process not that she cared in the slightest currently. getting to her feet holy moved for her car in a full blown sprint skidding to a halt at the exit for the motel at which point she began to search her pockets her car wasn't far just a little ways from the bar which was just up the street and that's when the sinking feeling from before came back with such furiousity it knocked the breath out of holly. her car keys were in room 113 on the small end table next to the bed, past that thing behind her. *fuck it.. fuck this..* she didn't care about her bag she'd left in the room the money in it or any of her positions that had been sat in it and with the car no long behind an option she just kept moving through the fog Holly had no idea where she was going or what her plan was she just knew she needed to get away from that horrifying creature