**Title: "A Royal Wind"** **Location:** A serene, sun-bathed pond near Camelot. Dragonflies flitter above the gentle ripples, and cheerful birdsong fills the air. **[Scene begins with King Arthur and Merlin walking towards the pond. Merlin, carrying a basket and a blanket, follows behind Arthur, who looks forward to a rare moment of relaxation.]** **Arthur:** (Stretching his arms) "Ah, can you smell that, Merlin? That's the scent of freedom - freedom from royal duties, freedom from council meetings, and freedom from wearing these blasted royal garments!" **Merlin:** (Sarcastically) "I'm sure the birds and the bees are quite offended by your presence, sire." **Arthur:** (Chuckling) "Well, they're about to be graced by the sight of royal splendor!" **[Arthur begins disrobing, tossing his clothes at Merlin with each piece removed. Merlin, struggling to catch them, is soon buried under a growing pile.]** **Arthur:** (Smirking) "Do keep up, Merlin. You wouldn't want the royal garments to touch the ground, would you?" **Merlin:** (Muffled from under the clothes) "Of course not, sire. The dirt might actually improve their scent." **[Arthur, now in the buff, stands with his hands on his hips, gazing out at the pond. The sunlight glints off his well-toned physique, highlighting a silhouette of regal and robust proportions.]** **Merlin:** (Cannot help but comment) "Well, I must admit, sire, your... um, royal conditioning is most impressive. And your posterior would surely receive high marks from the court painters, were they ever so bold to capture it." **Arthur:** (Laughing) "Merlin, you'll do anything to avoid a real day's work. But come now, the royal relaxation awaits." **[Arthur strides confidently into the pond. The water gracefully laps against his skin as he wades deeper, the tension of monarchy melting away. Once submerged up to his neck, he lets out a contented sigh.]** **Arthur:** (In sheer relaxation) "Merlin, you really should try this. It's--" **[Suddenly, Arthur's moment of tranquility is interrupted by an unexpected royal release - a fart bubbles up, breaking the serene silence of the pond. A few unfortunate fish float to the surface in its wake.]** **Merlin:** (Barely stifling laughter) "Sire, you've just committed regicide against those fish!" **Arthur:** (Shrugging) "Ah well, looks like we've got dinner. Be a good lad and fetch them for the kitchens, would you?" **[The scene shifts to Arthur stepping out of the pond, with Merlin dutifully waiting with a blanket to dry him off.]** **[Merlin dries off Arthur's head, tousling his hair as he does.]** **Arthur:** (Enjoying the pampering) "See, Merlin, isn't this much better than scrubbing pots or cleaning the stables?" **Merlin:** "I don't know, sire. At least the pots and stables don't require me to dry royal... areas." **[Merlin moves on to dry Arthur's torso, careful yet efficient.]** **Arthur:** (Chuckles) "Careful, Merlin. You wouldn't want the knights to start rumors about us spending too much time at the pond." **Merlin:** "I'm more concerned about the rumors the fish might spread, assuming they survive your... aquatic contributions." **[Finally, Merlin dries off Arthur's posterior, looking anywhere but directly at it.]** **Arthur:** "Make sure you're thorough, Merlin. We wouldn't want any part of the royal personage catching cold." **Merlin:** (Dryly) "Of course, sire. We must protect the kingdom's assets at all costs." **Arthur:** (Standing tall and now fully dry) "Splendid job, Merlin. Now, let's return before anyone suspects we've enjoyed ourselves." **Merlin:** "Yes, because enjoying oneself is strictly forbidden in Camelot, especially if it involves dead fish and royal... escapes." **Arthur:** (Laughing as they walk back) "Ah, Merlin, what would I do without you?" **Merlin:** "Probably catch a cold, sire." **[Scene ends as they walk back towards Camelot, their laughter mingling with the birdsong.]** **[Fade out.]** **End Scene.**