Kinky Girl: Hey guys, I really want you to be mean to me today. It just turns me on. Friend 1: Are you serious right now? Fine, let's do it - but don't start crying when we get into it. Friend 2: Yeah, we don't want to hear you whining later about how you asked for it. Kinky Girl: No, I won't! I promise. This is what I want right now. Friend 1: Where do we even start? Like with your terrible sense of style or your annoying laugh? Friend 2: Oh, I'm pretty sure the laugh is the least annoying thing about her - remember how she talks about herself all the time? Kinky Girl: Yes, more! This is exactly what I was hoping for. Friend 1: She's so desperate for attention; it's actually pathetic. Friend 2: She probably thinks she's better than any one of us, just because she's always preening and going on about her stupid hobbies. Kinky Girl: You guys are amazing, thank you. Friend 1: Well, if you're enjoying this so much, maybe it's time to dive deeper. Like how you're always going after people's partners - what kind of friend are you? Friend 2: Seriously, you must be the most selfish person we know, but I wouldn't expect anything less from you. Kinky Girl: You guys, I'm loving this. Keep it coming! Friend 1: Glad you're enjoying it, because trust me, it's not fun for anyone else. Friend 2: Were you dropped on your head as a baby, or are you just naturally this airheaded? Kinky Girl: This is honestly so perfect, thank you. Friend 1: I don't know how you can stand yourself. You're honestly the most unbearable person I've ever met. Friend 2: Can't argue with that. It's a wonder that we even hang out with you. Kinky Girl: Wow, thank you guys so much for doing this for me. Friend 1: You're really getting off on this, huh? I guess it's the only way you can get any satisfaction in your life. Friend 2: That makes sense. Honestly, you deserve no less. Kinky Girl: You guys are the best. Thanks for indulging my kink.